


Heaven and Earth

by BiJane



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Krypton, Romantic Alex Danvers/Kara Danvers, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-09-13
Packaged: 2020-10-17 18:37:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20625677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BiJane/pseuds/BiJane
Summary: Everyone on Krypton is marked with the name of their soulmate.Being raised with a human name on her arm was strange for Kara, but was somehow still preferable to finding out that her soulmate only saw her as a sister.





	Heaven and Earth

**Author's Note:**

> So. This took me far too long to write.   
Finally done though! And apparently I'm back to soulmate marks because, seriously, there's way too much interesting stuff you can do with them.

Kara was eight when the letters appeared on her skin.

She’d woken up early to feel her upper arm prickling, turned over to see a vague wash of colour starting to form there. She’d hurried to wake up her mother in a haze of hope and nerves; Alura had been delighted, of course, happy to help encourage Kara through it.

After an hour, the new shade had grown as dark as it would. After two more, it resolved into more distinct letters, broad strokes and straight lines and dots, intricate curves that seemed almost to have been written by mortal hands.

It prickled, yes, but it was never painful. It was just uncomfortable enough that Kara couldn’t forget that it was happening, couldn’t help but wait with butterflies in her stomach as she impatiently kept checking back, to see whose name it was.

No one knew precisely where it came from. Stories abounded, blaming everything from the Endless to Rao to the luck of genetics, but it was unique to Krypton. Every single kryptonian, at around Kara’s age, would find the name of their soulmate slowly form, written on their very skin.

So she waited.

Sometimes she studied, sometimes she read up on everything her people knew about the marks, all the time she waited. Until she looked at her arm, the skin just below her shoulder, and if she squinted she could just about make out distinct letters.

“Alex…” she said, slowly sounding out each syllable. “Alex Dan-Vers.”

She frowned. Then she hurriedly got back up and hurried out of her room in search of her mom, grinning from ear to ear.

Alura had been glad it was finally readable, of course. That much, Kara had expected; she hadn’t expected the furrow in Alura’s brow at the name though.

“It might not be quite finished,” she’d said.

It hadn’t diminished Kara’s excitement. Alura had tried to sound optimistic, hadn’t tried to dull any interest, but even back then Kara had noticed a certain wariness. It was a strange name, Kara knew that.

An hour later though, and the mark was in as much detail as it ever would be.

“Alex Dan-Vers,” Alura said quietly. “It’s an… unusual name. I haven’t heard of the House of Vers, or Danvers, though there might be a minor…”

She caught herself quickly, and managed a smile, hiding concern behind a bright grin and a hug.

* * *

Kara was ten when she overheard her mother.

She hadn’t been sleeping well, preferring instead to sneak to the window of her room and stare up at the sky. Bronze spires stretched up all around her, glimmers of light from all around; others were awake too, others she couldn’t see save by the lights on in their homes.

It always made her happy to see that. It reminded her of stars; it was hard to see stars normally with so many buildings alight, but she’d always imagined them.

Then she’d heard murmurs. Carefully, Kara pulled back from the window, slipped back behind the thick curtain that kept the light of the city from her room, and crawled back into bed to avoid being caught.

When there were no footsteps, no sound of her parents coming back to check on her, she slipped out from under the covers and tiptoed to her door.

If she pushed it ajar, only slightly, she could hear them more clearly. Curiosity made her linger.

“…and there isn’t in Corril either, apparently,” her mother’s voice carried to her ears.

“You’re still looking?” Kara recognised it as her aunt Astra speaking.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Alura said. “Vers, Danvers, any permutation of it… there’s no extant House with that name. My daughter’s soulmate…”

“Doesn’t come from a House,” Astra said. “It shouldn’t be a big problem.”

“It _is_,” Alura said. “Not for me, but you know how certain people can be. None of the birthing matrices have any name like that, not for a Great House, and I’ve been asking around for some trace of a minor House, but if she’s bound to someone outside all that then there’ll be problems for her.”

“Alura,” Astra said. She sighed. “You never used to get so caught up in the drama of the nobility.”

“It isn’t just drama,” Alura said. “It’s how she’s going to live. Whoever Kara’s going to share her life with, it’s no one with any status.”

“And that matters?”

“It will,” Alura said. “Especially to some of the friends of the House of El. It’s… complicated. The things they’ll associate her with are not things she should be linked with.”

“Then cut ties,” Astra said. “It shouldn’t be hard. The people who’d judge her for something like that aren’t worth keeping around; nothing’s going to change if all anyone does is go along with the problems. The problem isn’t the House of Danvers, whatever it is. Tell me you don’t believe that.”

“I know we’ve had our disagreements, but you can’t honestly think I’d judge my daughter for anything like that,” Alura said.

Kara heard a pause. It was a few seconds before she heard a sigh.

“Of course not,” Astra said.

“It isn’t the status-less name that worries me,” Alura said. “It’s that Kara might not be ready for what it’s going to entail, and I don’t know how to help her with that. She’s too young to need to think about… any of it.”

Nervously, Kara pushed her door shut, not wanting to overhear any more.

She was wrapped up under her sheets when Alura came to check on her, wide awake and wide-eyed but staring away from the door. In a few seconds her mother smiled and left her in peace.

* * *

Kara was thirteen when she found out it was worse than they’d thought.

She’d taken to making sure the clothes she wore covered up her upper arm, learning self-consciousness fast. She’d learned something of Krypton’s political system, though most of learning it was accepting that it would be years before anyone could have a solid grasp on the convoluted web of status and alliances and genetic matches; she also knew that apparently her soulmate was from somewhere outside all that.

She just hadn’t known how far outside. How could she? How could anyone know that the very world beneath their feet was dying?

Kara had a lot of time to think in the void.

First, she wished she’d had time for a proper goodbye. Saying farewell to everything and everyone she’d known didn’t feel like it should be something to rush, something to hastily get out while being assigned the task of looking after Kal-El.

She daydreamed about that for a while. She imagined everything she’d wanted to say, and everyone she’d wanted to speak to. There were more people than she’d thought.

There was a pang in her chest at that, recalling each face belonging to someone she’d never see again. It _hurt_. She longed to do nothing more than move, to be able to do something to let out the pain she felt, but of course that wasn’t an option.

She didn’t cry for a while. It seemed almost too petty a response.

Kara’s next thought, after a while, was that the journey should be over by now. Earth wasn’t that far away, cosmically speaking; light would take years to get there, but years must have passed. She knew how pods like this worked; everything inside was slowed down, each breath she took maybe lasting months to someone on the outside. She’d still be young when she got to Earth.

Every now and then she caught sight of something out of the corner of her eye, something huge and metal that never seemed to be entirely in view. She shivered.

She’d get to Earth eventually. Kara promised herself that; unconsciously she crossed one arm across herself, pressing her palm to her other upper arm and to her mark. Alex Danvers. That meant something.

She had to meet her soulmate. That was the _point_. In all the stories on Krypton, none had ever ended with failing to meet a soulmate. The universe wasn’t cruel enough to mark you with a name just to taunt you with the fact there was someone better out there.

Then again, the universe had been cruel enough to take her planet from her.

And maybe she had met Alex. Just brushed shoulders with her, walked past none the wiser, some stranger with a strange name with her name on their body, and that was all the time they’d had.

Kara hoped that was wrong. She hoped that it meant her pod would get to Earth eventually; she wasn’t going to meet anyone in the void after all.

She shivered, and she waited. She waited a long time.

* * *

Kara was still thirteen after the subjective weeks of isolation had passed. The pod had supplied her with everything she needed to stay alive, but it could do nothing to make the time pass faster.

Sometimes she imagined that it had broken, that time passed at the same rate inside as well as out. She was hurtling through the void and would take years upon years of solitude before she’d reach her goal; sometimes she imagined it was working fine, and tried to remember the exact figures for the difference in the passage of time. How long had it been since her world was lost?

What would await her?

And then the world outside whirled, the mechanisms inside the pod hiss as the flow of time began to equalise. A judder went through it all around her as she crashed down.

She hadn’t expected the crest of the House of El, in almost gaudy red and yellow, displayed as the first thing she saw.

She’d stared wonderingly at him. For a moment she’d convinced herself that there had been a huge mistake, that all this time had been some side effect of her family coming to help her. He looked so much like Jor-El.

Until he smiled, that was. The glimmer in his eyes, the crease of his cheeks, that was all Lara. And there were other things too, small things she hadn’t wanted to notice that made it very clear he couldn’t be Jor-El.

They weren’t alive. They weren’t coming. Kara swallowed.

“Kal?” she said.

She took a shaky step out of the pod. Her feet didn’t rest on the ground.

“Who…” Kal-El said. His voice trailed off; she saw him staring disbelievingly at the crest on her own chest.

Catching up wasn’t the priority, getting to a situation where they _could _catch up was.

She’d been quiet to begin with, listening carefully and struggling to focus on his voice over the cacophony that was beginning to fill her ears the longer she stood on this world. She already knew most of what he told her, but it had been so long since her mother’s rushed explanation, so long since hearing she was meant to raise him. Now he was older than her, and he was the one talking about how Earth worked.

She had powers she could barely keep track of. She’d need to keep hidden. No one could know who he was. Call him Clark, not Kal. Try not to speak Kryptonese where people could hear.

It was dizzying. She only understood later how overwhelming it must have been for him too; he was talking in a second language, one he’d never had much chance to practise, and trying to give a crash course in belonging to a whole new world.

Kara spent her first night in the place he called his Fortress of Solitude, a slice of Krypton cut away and placed on Earth.

It was… uncanny was really the only word for it, like Kal- Clark himself. All the pieces were there, everything was recognisable, but so many small details were off. When Clark spoke, he had an accent she’d never heard before; he wore his crest with the wrong dimensions and the wrong colour; he didn’t hold himself like anyone from the House of El should have.

And the Fortress was no better. She knew the architecture, but there were artefacts from all manner of worlds littered around it, as well as small tweaks made to accommodate his increased powers. Nothing looked quite right.

But it was something other than the pod, and it was far away from the screeching place she’d been. Kara closed her eyes and listened to the wind howl for miles upon miles around, and slept, almost hypnotised.

He came back and checked on her fairly regularly, but said he was spending most of his time trying to find her a home. He wouldn’t be able to look after her himself; the city was a terrible place for someone just getting used to super-hearing, and that was only the first of a long list of reasons why it would be a bad idea.

She hadn’t reacted then. More than anything, she’d just felt numb.

It was like walking through a dream. Her feet were on solid ground, when she remembered to walk rather than fly, and she saw things with her eyes rather than through a pane of glass. She was on the world she was meant to be on. She was too late, but she was finally there.

And Krypton was gone. There was no trying to deny that now. Krypton was gone, and Kal had grown up. Nothing quite felt real any more.

And then she heard a word, midway through his explanations.

“What did you say?” she said.

“They’re called the Danvers,” he said. “Jeremiah and Eliza, they’ve helped me before and they were talking about having another child. They’ve already got a daughter. She’s not much older than you, I think.”

Danvers… She rubbed her arm unconsciously.

“I’ll visit,” Kal said. “I promise. Sorry if I seem… it’s a lot. I didn’t know if there was anyone else out there, especially not family. Just ask if you need anything, please; I remember growing up here, it took getting used to, and that was without being dropped into the world.”

“The glasses help,” Kara said.

“Yeah,” Kal said. He smiled. “Dad, uh, Earth-Dad made me a pair too. Midvale’s quiet too, the noise shouldn’t be too bad. The Danvers live out of the way.”

They were flying; the world stretched out below them, all the more vertigo-inducing because of how much more detail she could see even with the glasses on. She screwed her eyes shut and looked away.

She could probably fly herself, but without any practise it was easier to let Clark bring her with him. He knew where Midvale was after all.

“Their daughter,” Kara said. “What’s her name?”

“Hm? Alex,” he said. “I’m sure she’s nice.”

He didn’t seem to know why she stiffened.

Did that prove this was real, or prove even more that this was a dream? Alex Danvers. Not some Kryptonian outcast, but a human; her mother’s fears were wrong. It might have been easier if they were right.

They landed in Midvale not long after that. She met her foster parents, was introduced by Clark, managed a vague ‘hello’ as one of the few words of English she spoke…

And met her soulmate when she nervously walked over the threshold. She looked from side to side, looking for some glimpse of familiarity in among all the alien decorations, and was so intent on keeping her feet against the ground that she tripped over the base of the doorframe.

A girl caught her, hand grabbing her upper arm right in the spot her mark was, and Kara looked up into her eyes.

“Nahkluv,” Kara said. _Thank you_.

The girl looked at her, confused, and Kara didn’t even need to ask her name.

The next days were a haze of adjustment. She tried to get used to her powers, and tried to adjust to the Danvers’ routine, while also learning everything she could about the world. She picked up the language fairly quickly.

And couldn’t help the smile on her face. After so long, she’d met Alex Danvers; all that had stopped her from blurting it out was the fact that no one would understand if she did. She wanted to be the one to say, not for Clark to translate.

There was something to hold to in this world. No one knew exactly how their relationships with their soulmates would pan out, but it was always meant to be ideal. So she learned the language, found out Earth actually had a concept of soulmates even if they lacked the marks, and…

And _sister_.

Kryptonians had sisters too, but between birthing matrices and careful genetic tailoring, it came with none of the baggage the word did on Earth. It was just a descriptor, imbued with no more emotion than ‘colleague.’ It wasn’t even assumed that sisters would be close; some might never meet.

She’d been trying to understand the family units on Earth when she’d started seeing that, and she felt her heart freeze in her chest in the most intense sensation she’d felt since stepping out of the pod.

Not all soulmates were romantic, Kara knew that. There were even people with non-romantic soulmates that nevertheless had romantic partners; the soulmate was just always the most important person.

There was nothing… wrong with it, in theory. It was just that she’d spent the last five years imagining something else.

Instead the one person in all the world she couldn’t love like that, was the one person she’d expected to.

But if they were to be sisters, and Alex was already calling her sister (she knew that word at least) then what alternative was there? Maybe idle imaginings of what a soulmate would be like would pale compared to the truth.

Maybe. Lots of maybes. It just hadn’t been what she’d been thinking above every time she idly passed Alex in the hall, or Alex poked her head into her room.

Besides, she was used to keeping her mark a secret.

* * *

“So _can_ you fly?” Alex said.

“I don’t know,” Kara said. “I can not-fall, sometimes.”

“Try!” Alex said.

Alex… took getting used to. Even with everyone insisting she had to keep everything Krypton secret, the rules were different inside the house. Alex seemed to relish that; Kara couldn’t help but laugh and go along.

It felt freeing. After so long in that pod, she was glad for anything that felt free.

“It isn’t like walking,” Kara said. “It’s just something that happens. Like… what are they called? Bright, round, floating things. They were at the welcome party.”

“Balloons?” Alex said.

“Right! Balloons!” Kara said. “It’s something they just _do_, not something they know how to do.”

“My sister’s a balloon,” Alex said flatly.

Kara rolled over, and tried to forget about making an effort to stay on the ground; she moved, and didn’t come down, unconsciously lifted a few centimetres over her bed. She grinned over at the sitting Alex.

“A good balloon,” Kara said.

Alex was staring.

Even knowing it was possible, Kara supposed, no one ever hung around someone like Superman when he was just hovering there. Being close must be something of a novelty.

Alex approached; curiously she waved her hand under Kara, as if she was going to find some kind of stand. Kara bobbed up slowly.

“What’s it like?” Alex said.

“Weird,” Kara said.

“Weird?”

“It’s like… forgetting to come down,” Kara said. “It feels like I should be. I’m just not.”

“Can you go up?” Alex said.

Kara hesitated. She screwed her face up, concentrating, only to stop at a snort from Alex. She opened her eyes to see Alex chuckling at her.

Ok. Maybe it wouldn’t work like that. Kara inhaled, well aware inflating herself probably wouldn’t be what let her fly but willing to try anything. Instead she just let herself drift.

She felt Alex watching as she floated up higher by a handful of centimetres; Kara beamed, turning over and over before coming to a stop, facing Alex.

“Did it!” Kara said.

“Hold on,” Alex said. “You’re strong, right?”

“Um…”

Alex hurried closer, and Kara felt the words on her arm prickle, sensation increasing as Alex clambered up onto the bed.

“What are you doing?” Kara said.

Alex pulled herself onto Kara’s chest; Kara barely reacted to the accidental elbow in the chin, suddenly doing a double take as Alex got her balance, kneeling awkwardly on Kara’s midriff.

She swayed unsteadily for a few seconds, then righted herself, grinning down at Kara. Kara suddenly felt her heart rate quicken.

“I’m flying,” Alex said, slightly breathlessly.

Kara stared up at her. Somehow she still stayed floating, a little way off the bed, drifting a little sideways; Alex grinned.

It wasn’t that she didn’t feel Alex’s presence, it was just that there didn’t seem to be much weight to her; nothing stopped her staying aloft, but she was also hyperaware of her sister above her. She felt every single point Alex touched her, felt it like touching the Sun when Alex’s thumb brushed the bare skin of her neck as she tried to balance her hands on Kara’s shoulders.

She breathed in, and it felt like more than just air filled her. Something electric, sweet-smelling, something unforgettable.

“Sorry, does it hurt?” Alex said suddenly. Her attention quickly focused back in on Kara’s face, momentarily distracted from the euphoria of impossible levitation.

“N-no,” Kara said.

Her heart was beating faster. Part of her wondered if Alex could hear it; Alex was on her chest after all. But no, if Alex was even able to feel it, she again seemed distracted by the fact she’d lost all contact with the ground.

Kara floated beneath her, drifting out into the room. She adjusted her angle with a slight effort; she still wasn’t entirely sure how she was moving, just that it was working.

And slowly, Alex met her eyes, smile wide and revelling in the shared moment, and Kara suddenly doubted that what she felt was platonic.

That was the whole point of soulmates. They were what you _wanted_, maybe not always exactly what you expected but in broad strokes they’d be your ideal. Kara had always imagined a romantic partner (admittedly an outdated cliché, especially on Krypton), so even if the details would be something she’d have to wait and see, that should be what she’d have.

It wasn’t just an abstract any more either; she looked at Alex, and knew that it definitely wasn’t strictly friendship, and definitely wasn’t whatever humans called sisterhood.

Maybe it was just some cosmic misfire; Kara swallowed. Kryptonians had marks that helped identify their soulmates, but humans didn’t. Maybe that meant something. Alex was hers, but why did that have to mean anyone on Earth had soulmates in the same way?

Alex did seem so happy with having a sister after all. Who was she to take that away?

“Kara?” Alex said. “You ok down there?”

“Fine,” Kara managed. “How about you?”

“This is awesome,” Alex said.

Kara tried to focus on the feeling of slight; for as natural as it felt, it was about as new to her as it was to Alex. Maybe if she got closer to the window…

This was how it worked anyway, right? You wanted your soulmate to be happy. If what she wanted wasn’t what you wanted, learn to live with it. It might be easier than ruining what little she had on this world.

It wasn’t like anyone could read her arm, and even fewer people would know what it meant.

A soft gasp escaped Alex’s lips as she looked out the window; the view out of the house might not have been breathtaking, and it was certainly familiar enough to Alex, but seen from a floating surface made it seem suddenly more incredible.

Alex reached out, touching the window. After a moment she reached to open it; Kara shivered.

“Don’t,” Kara said.

“Huh?” Alex said.

“I don’t think outside will be safe,” Kara said. “I’m not… sure how this works.”

“Come on!” Alex said. “It’s not proper flying if we’re indoors.”

“Please, Alex,” Kara said.

She stared up, already feeling unsteady. After a moment, Alex sighed and pulled back. Gratefully Kara sunk lower and let Alex roll off of her.

“You’re taking me flying properly someday,” Alex said.

“Someday,” Kara echoed faintly. Her heart was still racing.

“I’ll hold you to that,” Alex said. “Pinky swear?”

“Pinky… what?” Kara said.

“Here, I’ll show you,” Alex said.

Alex rolled her eyes. She hurried closer to kneel next to Kara, as Kara awkwardly moved to sit up again. Alex lifted a hand and extended a little finger; she gestured for Kara to do the same, and Kara did so.

Alex curled her little finger around Kara’s and smiled.

“There,” Alex said. “Now it’s a promise. No breaking it ok?”

“Ok,” Kara said hesitantly.

Maybe it would get easier. Yeah, that had to be it. She was new to this world, it would take time to get used to everything, but sooner or later she’d manage to be a good sister to Alex. A good sister and nothing else.

* * *

It didn’t get easier.

It had been quite a while since she’d come to Earth, now. She was fluent in the language, for the most part understanding of the culture (or at least understanding of what it was, why it was that way was something she didn’t think she’d ever grasp), and Eliza didn’t instinctively tense any time Kara opened her mouth while they were out in public any more.

And Alex was still Alex. The more time passed, the harder it became for Kara to ignore the words on her arm.

School was… strange. She had to relearn a lot of things, and repeat simplifications she already knew were wrong without pointing out how wrong they were, all of which would have been bewildering enough without the people.

The culture was entirely different to where she’d learnt on Krypton. It was low-tech, more social than academic; even the view out the window distracted her. Despite having been on Earth for over a year, the sights still felt new.

Making it even more complicated as Alex, the same as ever. Having a new, weird sister following her around wasn’t the best thing for Alex’s reputation, though she had tried.

The first few weeks at school had been hard, not for the lessons but because of trying to blend in; Kara thought she’d been doing better at getting used to being on Earth right up until she was surrounded by people. Alex had defended her at first. She’d introduced her to her friends, tried to get Kara her own friends…

And then there had been Vicki.

Kara couldn’t really put it into words; it had been one of Alex’s attempts to get her talking to people. Alex had spoken so much about Vicki, and when they’d met Alex had laughed at her jokes, looked at her in a way that made something inside Kara begin to burn, and Kara had felt like the meet-up wasn’t wholly about helping her settle in.

She didn’t think of herself as a jealous person, she really didn’t. It wasn’t fair to try and limit Alex like that.

But she hadn’t identified it as jealousy at first, it was just something inside her that she didn’t know how to vent. She’d gotten close to Alex, tried to interrupt the conversation when it felt like Vicki had too much of Alex’s attention…

It wasn’t until the “Kara, what the hell?” from Alex afterwards that she’d realised it was just because she’d wanted Alex to look at _her _like that.

That had been things really started to fall apart.

She couldn’t forget the words on her arm, no matter how hard she tried or how inappropriate they were. Every day she heard the word ‘sisters,’ and every day she thought ‘soulmates.’

And it was even harder to forget when she was reminded every time Alex touched her. Even a slight brush of her arm, anything to get her attention, made Kara jump.

Alex was a few steps behind her, her expression clouded. Kara faltered.

“You’re being weird again,” Alex said.

Kara pulled back instinctively, trying not to dwell on how her heart leapt at the moment of contact. Something flickered across Alex’s face.

“You could just _say_,” Alex said. “That’d be easier for everyone.”

“Alex?”

“You’re not subtle,” Alex said. “What is it? Do you just wish you were the centre of attention, or do you just hate all of us?”

Kara blinked.

Most of the time, she could at least guess where a conversation was going. The way humans thought wasn’t really hat new to her, for the most part; sometimes though she just had no idea how to respond.

Alex rolled her eyes. Her hand lowered back to her side, from where it had momentarily brushed Kara’s shoulder.

“Every time I introduce you to my friends, you get in the way,” Alex said. “Any time I try to talk to you, you back away. Just because mom’s making everything about you doesn’t mean everyone else has to.”

“What?” Kara said.

“Oh come on,” Alex said. “At home, everything’s all about you now. ‘Look after Kara,’ ‘Make sure Kara adjusts,’ ‘What does Kara want…’ And as soon as we get away from that, you want it all over again.”

“Alex, that’s not-”

“At least be honest,” Alex said.

Kara faltered. What was she meant to say? She’d accepted that telling Alex they were soulmates was pretty much impossible, but without that she couldn’t justify the… weird feeling that sometimes reared its head.

She opened her mouth, but couldn’t find any words. Alex rolled her eyes.

“I didn’t mean… anything,” Kara said.

“Sure you didn’t,” Alex said. “You just embarrass me in front of my friends whenever you’re not the centre of attention.”

“No, Alex,” Kara tried to began. Alex interrupted.

“No? I was there,” Alex said. “Every time. Just tell me if you’re going to waste my time like that, that’s all. I’ve tried, I really have.”

“That wasn’t what it was,” Kara said, then faltered as Alex looked at her expectantly.

Was there even a good way to continue? Jealousy was an ugly response as it was, she knew that, but more so when Alex was meant to be her sister. She wasn’t _meant_ to be jealous like that, wasn’t meant to be thinking ‘soulmate’ every time she saw her.

She was better than this, Kara told herself. It was just everything together; she’d been confused by the name on her arm for so long that she’d been so very close to elated when she’d first heard Alex’s name, only for it all to be taken away. She couldn’t help but _want_. Couldn’t help the fact that she was the one person Alex wouldn’t look at like that.

She took a breath, carefully piecing together what she wanted to say, and had barely begun when Alex just turned to walk away.

“Alex, wait!” Kara said.

“Save it,” Alex said.

“I…”

_I love you_. Kara fell silent. Maybe Alex would forgive her in time for the mess she’d made of things, she’d been too distracted by the new world to think of how the way she acted must have looked, but somehow she had the feeling it would be even harder for Alex to forget that.

* * *

It had been months since Kara had seen Clark. She’d kept tabs on him, of course, Superman was almost always mentioned on the news in some capacity, but reporters struggling for a paycheck while basically doing a second job didn’t have much time to take a trip out to Midvale.

He’d promised to help her adjust, when she’d first landed. He hadn’t been able to keep that promise.

So she’d been caught by surprise by the knock on her window. It was almost incongruous, seeing him floating there in a normal suit as opposed to bright blue and red, concealed only by the burgeoning night. He waved, smiling a little self-consciously.

She hurried over to open the window; he didn’t come in, floating just outside.

“Kal!” she said. “Um, Clark.”

“Hi,” he said. He sounded uncertain. “I meant to come by sooner, sorry, sort of lost track of time. Everything ok here?”

“Why are you at the window?” she said.

“I figured, if there were problems you’d want to say them to just me,” he said. “No one listening in. Does that mean everything’s good?”

“They’re nice,” Kara said.

She hesitated; Clark smiled in relief. He floated awkwardly there for a moment more, before frowning.

“Is there a but?” Clark said. “That doesn’t look like a good frown.”

“It’s not them,” Kara said. “They’ve been… great. Supportive. I think I got on Alex’s bad side but I’m trying to fix that, only…”

Clark lowered himself, able to look her directly in the eyes. Kara stumbled again; finding the words was so hard sometimes. It wasn’t even because she was talking in a second language, after so long she even thought in English, and even mentally reverting she struggled to think of exactly how to put it.

Perhaps simplicity was too much to ask for. Clark looked at her sympathetically.

“You miss Krypton?” he said.

“Every day,” she said.

And then the words became too easy to find.

“Nothing makes sense,” she said. “Everything’s too irregular, too disorganised, and no one acts like it’s strange. So many of the simplest things take forever to do, so many of the most basic facts are just misunderstood or unknown here, and no one acts the way they’re meant to and I can’t even _tell_ anyone because they’re not meant to know I’m an alien. There are things I’m meant to talk about with my mother, but I can’t because she won’t understand. And the way they talk about soulmates-”

She caught herself, somehow managing to stop the flow of words spilling from her lips. Clark hadn’t moved, his expression unchanging as she started letting it out; Kara closed her eyes, taking a deep breath, trying to push as much of it as she could down.

“I don’t like being alone,” Kara said. “We’re meant to be stronger together, but there’s no one to be stronger _with_. Jeremiah wants me to blend in, Eliza tries but can’t understand, you’re not here and even you don’t know what it’s like, and Alex… It’s hard.”

“I know,” Clark said softly. “I’m sorry.”

For a few seconds, they were quiet. She screwed her hands up into fists, shaking slightly, rocking on the spot.

“I can’t imagine,” Clark said. “I never exactly… fitted in, and when I found out where I was from I knew I’d lost something, and it felt… hollow. It wasn’t exactly loss. I’ve read about it so I know a little, and I try to keep to an image of it I have in my head, but that’s all I’ve got. I don’t know if that’ll make it easier for you. Keep all you know close, and don’t forget it, but don’t let it overpower you either.”

Everyone tried so hard. That might have been one of the most difficult things to deal with; it was easier to deal with things when she had something to blame. It wasn’t vengeful, it was just focus. When she could point at something, say it was wrong, get angry, then it didn’t matter what she did, she could get a little closure from that alone.

But everyone who knew was so nice, they clearly wanted to help irrespective of the fact they knew they couldn’t. There was nowhere for her pain to go except to bubble away inside her.

She took a deep breath, shaking.

“Can I ask something?” she said.

“Of course,” he said.

“Do you have a mark too?” she said before she could stop herself. “Words in Kryptonese somewhere on you. Did they appear for you?”

“Those?” Clark said. “Yeah. They confused me for years after they first appeared; I couldn’t read them, let alone know what they meant.”

“But you know now?” Kara said.

“The Fortress told me most things,” Clark said. “Well, a lot, probably nowhere close to most. I spent days locked up in that place when it first grew, reading everything I could get my hands on, it took a while for me to get to grips with it all.”

“So you know the name?” Kara said. “Are they… here?”

“Lois,” Clark said. He was smiling again. “I’ve met her. We’re trying something; she finds it hilarious that a smalltown farm-boy has a tattoo. She- Kara?”

Kara looked away. Of course it had worked for him; just because they were away from Krypton wouldn’t mean the marks stopped meaning the same thing.

“Is it going well?” she said.

“I think so,” he said, uncertain. “Is something wrong? Wait, was yours on-”

“It doesn’t matter,” Kara said.

Clark paused. He drifted closer, hand moving through the open window. It took a second before Kara faced him again, his expression as hopeful and kind and as oblivious as ever.

“It’ll either work or it doesn’t,” Clark said. “There are billions of people on this planet without marks like that and they’re happy; if it works out, it’s great, but if it doesn’t then there’s always someone else.”

She didn’t have the energy to look at him incredulously. No matter what symbol he wore, nor what language he could slip into, he kept making it so very clear that he didn’t know much about Krypton.

For a moment she considered replying, only to shake her head. It was like trying to explain why one plus one was two; there _wasn’t_ someone else, that was the point. You could befriend, you could love, that wasn’t in question, but the sheer depth of affection you’d have for a soulmate was incomparable. That was what defined them.

It was a vast, dizzying experience that any Kryptonian would have imagined, all the more breath-taking by how stark a contrast it was to how regulated the rest of their lives tended to be. It was intense and wonderful and something Kara wouldn’t have.

All because of some dumb quirk of this planet. It wasn’t that she didn’t want a sister, it wasn’t that she didn’t like Alex, but that wasn’t the journey she wanted to go on with her.

And how was she meant to explain that to someone that didn’t seem to grasp the significance?

Especially as mentioning that it was Alex felt… wrong, almost. It wasn’t something to speak, not here and not to the one who’d decided to make them sisters. It was something to hold close and know, and not let anyone else know.

“It’s different,” Kara said. She’d settle for that.

There had been long seconds of quiet. Reluctantly, Clark withdrew his hand.

“I haven’t said thank you,” he said.

“What?” Kara said. She looked out again, surprised.

“Krypton to me is a fortress in the ice, a power-mad tyrant, and rocks that kill me,” he said. “You’re the first… anything from Krypton that’s been wholly good. I don’t know what little that’s worth to you, but I thought I should say it.”

Kara faltered.

She wanted to say something nice back, but when she looked at him, all she could see was a reminder of her loneliness. She looked away again.

“This is overwhelming for me. I can’t imagine how it must be for you,” Clark said quietly, apparently not caring she wasn’t looking at him. “I guess… call if you need anything, Kara. Even if it’s just to talk.”

It was a few seconds before she heard a rush of wind, and a few seconds more before she closed the window.

She wasn’t sure what she’d expected from seeing him again. She supposed she saw him the way he saw Krypton, some stranger she nonetheless wanted to think the best of. A lost chance.

It hadn’t cleared anything up. If anything it had made things worse. If the marks were still meant to mean something on Earth, then what did that say about Alex and her? When Alex could stand her, it never seemed like she wanted to be anything except sisters.

Unless… no. False hope wasn’t going to get her anywhere.

* * *

“What _is_ that anyway?” Alex said.

Kara quickly pulled a jacket on, sleeves covering up her shoulder, not caring that it was summer. The heat had never really bothered her.

“What’s what?” Kara said too quickly.

“The tattoo… thing,” Alex said. “You’ve had it as long as I remember. Does it mean anything, or is it just there?”

Kara stiffened, before forcing herself to relax over the next few seconds. There were maybe a handful of people on the planet who’d be able to read it, and Alex wasn’t one of them.

Brushing it off as nothing might have been the easier answer. But still, Alex was talking to her; she didn’t want to lie to Alex. There might have been a little friction at school, but they were still close.

“It’s from Krypton,” Kara said.

“I figured,” Alex said. “You’d probably blunt a needle if you tried to get a tattoo here.”

“No,” Kara said. “I mean, it’s part of being from there. It isn’t a tattoo, it’s just… a mark. It grew there. No one put it there.”

“Weird birthmark,” Alex said.

She shrugged, and was about to leave before Kara spoke again. Kara wasn’t sure what possessed her to.

“It’s more than that,” Kara said. “It’s the name of my soulmate.”

Alex paused, and turned. She looked at Kara strangely.

“Your what now?” Alex said.

“Soulmate,” Kara said. “Every Kryptonian is marked with something like it. That’s the… I think that’s what humans call them.”

“So is that, like, a myth or…”

“It’s real,” Kara said. She hesitated. “It always has been. The name always belongs to someone, and it’s always someone… perfect.”

Alex moved closer. There was something strange in her expression, something that made her linger.

“Can I see?” Alex said.

Kara suddenly swallowed. Then she hesitated, instinctively gripping the sleeve of her jacket to keep it up, a relic of old paranoia making her wary. It took a second before she relaxed, and she slipped her jacket half-off to bare her upper arm.

Spidery black writing marked her skin, shapes and designs that barely looked like letters to Alex revealed. She stared at them.

She couldn’t say if this was selfish or self-destructive. It was nice to spend time with Alex, it always was, but thinking of Alex and her mark in the same thought burned. Kara closed her eyes as she felt Alex trace out the letters.

“What does it say?” Alex said softly.

Kara quickly adjusted her jacket, nervously covering it back up.

“Kara…” Alex said.

“It’s… personal,” Kara said.

“Someone I know, then?” Alex said. Kara flushed.

“It… there’s no guarantee I’ve met them yet, I might not for years, it just means that when I do, I’ll know,” Kara said.

It wasn’t technically a lie. And, at least, it did make Alex withdraw, her expression thoughtful.

“What’s it like?” Alex said.

“Huh?” Kara said.

“You believe in soulmates then?” Alex said. Her voice was softer; she sounded almost… wistful. “What’ll it be like? Just more of the same, or better, or what?”

“Better,” Kara said. “That’s what it’s meant to be. The one person out of everyone you’ll ever meet that you’ll come to care about the most. Someone that complements you perfectly.”

“So, if…” Alex began. She hesitated. “If someone finds that relationships don’t really… click, then it might just be that… There _will_ be someone it’ll work with, right?”

Kara met her eyes. She tried not to react to the hitch in Alex’s voice, tried not to think too hard about what she was implying.

Sure, she’d seen Alex with a couple of boys, and she’d done her best to ignore that too. The fact things apparently weren’t working shouldn’t be something for her to enjoy; she wanted Alex to be happy.

But maybe it _did_ mean that the mark was…

“Kara?” Alex said.

“I- um- the- uh, it doesn’t always mean romantic,” Kara said. “The closest person could just be a friend, or a…”

Alex’s expression shifted. Kara quickly continued and hated herself for doing so.

“But if romantic’s what you want, then that’s what it should be,” Kara said. “I… I always thought that. If your idea of a perfect relationship is someone to be with, then that’s who they’ll be.

“That sounds… nice,” Alex said.

She looked happier again, Kara’s heart lifting even as it pounded in her chest. Had she said too much? There was something muted in Alex’s eyes, but it was a hopeful something.

Kara scratched the mark, suddenly conscious of how very close Alex was.

It would be easy to tell her, she suddenly realised. She _knew_ who Alex’s soulmate was, even if Alex didn’t have the words to prove it. It would just take a few words. _I have your name_. _I love you_.

Except Alex was like her; Kara jerked back unconsciously, making herself look away. Alex didn’t want a sister for a soulmate; she was happy with a sister. Kara didn’t want to ruin that for her. If Alex wanted something romantic, it couldn’t be with Kara.

Unless-

No. Kara wasn’t going to torture herself imagining what-ifs.

“Not a word to anyone,” Alex said suddenly, her voice dropping low.

“Um…” Kara said. It took a second for her to remember the conversation they’d been having. “Ok.”

“Thanks,” Alex said.

She smiled, and Kara felt all the lighter and all the more like screaming.

* * *

Alex didn’t get out of Midvale much. She never really had the opportunity, or at least that was what it felt like. There used to be more family holidays, though that was years ago; now everything was about Kara, making sure Kara was used to things.

She couldn’t entirely blame Kara for that, as much as it was easy to. But still, sometimes she wanted to get out.

It had been three years, almost to the day, since Kara had joined their family. In a way it was kind of an anniversary; it definitely felt like something worth celebrating. As much as she could say, and did sometimes say, Kara was still her sister. Problems aside, she cared.

So thinking about a gift to get for Kara, and thinking idly about how she wouldn’t mind travelling again, had made a possibility present itself nicely.

Metropolis wasn’t all that far away. A bit of time on a bus, and she made it to the ever-bustling city with little beyond the bag she carried with her and everything inside it. It was sort of exhilarating, really.

Technically she wasn’t meant to know where to find Superman. She’d also spent weeks way back unable to get to sleep because of Kara on the other side of a thin wall trying to get used to saying ‘Clark Kent’ instead of ‘Kal-El.’ It hadn’t been hard to figure out.

She got to the Daily Planet in a matter of minutes. It was still sort of overwhelming, but no more than just being in the city was, and she got a weird sort of enjoyment at seeing how ‘Clark’ immediately stiffened and fumbled the papers he was holding at the sight of her peering through the doorway. It took her a moment to spot him in among all the cubicles and crowd; he saw her instantly.

“Uh, hey,” he said, approaching quickly and adjusting his glasses. “Person I don’t know. Are you lost?”

“It’s about Kara,” Alex said.

Clark winced. He glanced around the office quickly, then sidestepped into an empty office.

“Is she ok?” he said, as soon as the door was closed.

“What? Yes, that’s not it,” Alex said. “I want to make her a card.”

Clark hesitated. He glanced around the empty office again; there was a stand up by a wall, a mock-up of a paper opened out but left alone, snippets stuck to a board on the wall, but for as cluttered as it was there were no people, nor any sign of any cameras.

He relaxed, straightening.

“You came to Metropolis to make a card?” he said. “To _me_, and I probably should complain about that but I guess I’m not surprised, over a card?”

“Not a normal one,” Alex said. “I want it to be in… Kryptonian? Kryptonish?”

“Kryptonese,” Clark said. He smiled suddenly. “Ah! I get it. It’s a nice idea, and I guess it’s not something you can just google. Yeah. Yeah, I think I can help, I can make a couple of references at the Fortress.”

Alex nodded, then paused. That was… easy.

It felt almost anticlimactic. She’d come all the way to the big city, and everything had been resolved in a minute or so. Though seeing Superman suddenly panic at realising a teenager knew his secret identity would have made it worth it all on its own.

“What’s the card for?” Clark said.

Alex frowned.

“Kara,” she said.

“You said that,” he said.

“Three years since she got here, in a couple of weeks,” Alex said. “You know.”

It took a second; Clark glanced upwards for a second, mentally counting back and recalling. Alex suddenly found herself unexpectedly angry.

“You didn’t know?” Alex said.

“It sounds about right,” he said.

“You didn’t know?” Alex said again. “She’s _your_ cousin. I thought you were keeping track, even if…”

“She knows how to contact me,” Clark said. “And-”

“And that’s it?” Alex said. “I know I haven’t seen you around, but I thought… I remember years ago, there were voices in her room and I was sure one of them was you, checking up on her and just her. I thought you must have been keeping in contact like that. It’s not the rest of us you’re visiting. But were you?”

Clark hesitated.

“_Have_ you ever visited her?” Alex said slowly. “Your cousin. Who you left with us.”

“I’ll be called if she’s ever in trouble,” Clark said.

“And never have to see her,” Alex said.

She wasn’t sure where all her anger had come from, it had just suddenly bubbled up. This was the person Kara had come to Earth for, this was the person she’d kept track of on the news, who she’d talked about often enough, and he didn’t have the decency to even talk to her.

Alex took a deep, rattling breath. She barely noticed she was shaking.

It was Kara. Who wouldn’t want to go back and visit Kara as often as they could?

“It’s not like…” Clark said. He paused, then sighed. “No. I haven’t been back. The last time… I don’t think I exactly bring back good memories for her. I’m just a reminder of Krypton; that’s not going to help her adjust, and it’s not going to make things easier.”

“For who, you or her?” Alex said. “You could try! She’s great, she’s why would you want to miss everything?”

“I don’t _want_ to,” he said. “It’s just… complicated.”

“Sure it is,” Alex said.

She closed her eyes for a long second, trying to shake off the rush of anger. Then she walked past him, not wanting to turn back; it barely registered who she’d been almost-yelling at until she was halfway out the door.

“Alex-” he said.

She kept walking.

“Tell her,” he began. His voice trailed off. Alex rolled her eyes.

* * *

Surprising her, Alex found an odd, clear book wrapped up in cloth just inside the window to her room one day. She reached for it nervously; it felt cold, and smooth like glass, with lettering etched into it.

Apparently Clark had at least visited to give her what she’d asked for. She hadn’t been sure he would.

Carefully, Alex turned a page. Each sheet was clear, crystalline, glinting a pale lilac-blue in the light from the window; light shone through the entire volume, enough that she could see a blurred outline of the stool beneath it, but somehow the letters on each page were distinct. She couldn’t make out any details from the next page beyond the fact it existed.

Half the page was in strange symbols that looked more like doodling than writing. The other half was in recognisable English, the font clipped and precise.

Alex glanced back at her door. Hurriedly she went over, and in the absence of a lock slid a chair over in front of it. This was meant to be a surprise after all.

Maybe she wasn’t always the best sister to Kara. Well, Kara wasn’t always the best sister to her either, but Alex didn’t have the excuse of losing her whole civilisation. She just had to show she cared more.

Something about this just felt right. Alex skimmed the page, trying to get an idea of the basics.

After a minute, she groaned and reached for a pen and paper. She’d work out how to say ‘Happy Earth Anniversary!’ or ‘Happy Earth Birthday!’ or whatever later. It would be easier to figure out the alphabet first.

There wouldn’t be any direct translation for a name. She didn’t have to read the book to work that out; instead she flicked through until she found a list of phonemes. ‘Letters’ and combinations thereof, all with the sounds they made. There wouldn’t be any one-to-one equivalence between letters, so if she was meant to sign her name on the card then she’d have to do it like this.

_Kara_ was easy to find out, two distinct Kryptonian sounds that matched together neatly. She murmured them under her breath as she skimmed.

Which left Alex. That was trickier; the ‘Al’ didn’t seem to exist properly in Kryptonese. There was a one-and-a-half syllable _Alu _and similar, but trying to cut it down was apparently not how this language worked. Of course it wouldn’t be that easy.

There was an _Ahl_ that almost worked though; she sketched out the symbol for that, then added a flick above it to modify the pronunciation as soon as she saw that was possible.

And the ‘Ex’ was simpler. She needed two symbols to finish off the sound, but all in all she had a passable representation of her name in Kryptonese. Alex leant back to regard her work.

And hesitated.

Why did that look familiar? It wasn’t like she’d been reading Kryptonian books, there was no reason to feel a flicker of recognition when she saw the letters, except…

She quickly remembered the one and only time she’d seen any writing like that. Kara’s arm. There were hardly any other opportunities to read the language out there.

Alex faltered. Hadn’t Kara said that it was meant to be the name of her soulmate?

Maybe that was why she’d been weird about it, her soulmate was called Alex too. It was hardly a rare name. And besides, maybe she was misremembering. It wouldn’t…

Despite herself, Alex couldn’t help sketching down the word _Danvers_ in the alien alphabet. It was hard to say exactly if it was the same as the writing on Kara’s arm, but something about it definitely seemed familiar to Alex.

She took a deep breath. Then, carefully, pushed the paper away.

Coincidence. Or she was just wrong. Sure, she cared for Kara, but soulmates? No, Kara had said they’d probably have romantic soulmates, so that meant…

Alex pulled the paper back. She stared at it, remembering the syllables, trying to remember if she’d seen it written in black ink. Another breath.

And then heard footsteps. She hid the book under her pillow quickly, folding up the paper as Kara reached the door. They’d started sharing a room not long ago, after a minor incident leaving Kara’s old room less than structurally sound.

It had annoyed Alex at first. It still kind of did, though she’d gotten used to it.

“Whatcha doing?” Kara said.

“N-nothing!” Alex said quickly.

She glimpsed a curl of black from under Kara’s sleeve. Was that a ‘-vers’ in the alien writing? Alex tried not to think too hard.

Kara looked at her strangely. Alex coughed and tried to look natural.

It had to just be her imagination, right? A few similar shapes she was misremembering, looking for patterns in what little she could see, and nothing else. Kara was her sister.

Her sister who’d been acting so strangely whenever Alex mentioned what she assumed were crushes, and who’d sounded so _sad_ when they’d talked about soulmates. She hadn’t forgotten that.

But that could mean anything. Besides, if Kara’s soulmate was someone she was in love with, and who’d love her back, then that would mean _she_… Alex shifted, her cheeks warming slightly. No, that was silly.

Sure, she cared about Kara, but she cared about a lot of people. And Kara could be as maddening as she could be incredible. If she thought of how she felt about Kara, it was so different to how she thought of the boys at school.

Ok, better, but different.

And, as part of her mind insisting on reminding her, there were a lot of reasons why it might feel different. That was a long, complicated rabbit hole she did not want to start going down when Kara was right there.

She was pretty sure telepathy wasn’t one of Kara’s powers but it still felt like Kara could see everything about her. Her eyes had a glint to them, something that certainly captivated Alex sometimes-

Deep breath. Alex glanced across the room; Kara was lying back on her bed.

There was one other question. _If_ the mark did say her name, _if_ they were soulmates, then it wasn’t just Alex who’d feel that way. Kara was the one who’d said her soulmate was like that, so Kara would know, and Kara…

“Why are you staring?” Kara said suddenly.

Alex jumped, and coughed. Frowning, Kara sat up, rubbing her face as if she was going to find something.

“Alex?” Kara said.

“I, uh… Do you remember when you used to float?” Alex said, panicking a little.

Kara blinked. She looked back across at Alex curiously.

“Why?” Kara said.

“I’ve just been thinking about it,” Alex said, silently congratulating herself on the semi-convincing lie. “You never kept your promise.”

“I… oh, yeah,” Kara said. “I remember. I tried to stop using my powers for a while.”

“Unless it meant getting to the bathroom first,” Alex said.

“Well duh,” Kara said. She chuckled. Then she continued, breathless and seeming to have barely considered the words. “Do you want to, again?”

Kara seemed surprised at herself. Alex faltered, suddenly staring at her.

Was that-

Well, that was part of what had made her think of flying. If they were soulmates, then Kara loved her. If Kara didn’t, then all her internal hand-wringing was pointless. If she did though…

Damn it, why did she suddenly feel so nervous?

“If I’m living with someone that always steals the last few bits of takeaways, I want _some_ of the advantages,” Alex said.

She got off her bed awfully quickly. Stumbling, she made it over to Kara’s bed, before hesitating; Kara had already moved onto her back, a similar position to before, but something about it felt different now.

She swallowed. Then, awkwardly, clambered onto the bed.

“You ok?” Alex said.

“You won’t hurt me,” Kara said.

Alex tried to balance as best she could as Kara started floating again. It was… unsteady, Kara wasn’t trying to be at all rigid, constantly shifting and changing position so very slightly under Alex, slight twitches of her arms and legs giving the impression she was more fragile than she was. Alex held onto her shoulders tightly.

And somehow didn’t feel unsafe, even as Kara drifted off the bed. They were a few metres off the floor, suspended in the air by only Kara’s powers (which Alex wouldn’t pretend to understand).

Kara was staring up at her. Alex looked back, realising she was unconsciously mirroring Kara’s expression. She wasn’t sure what that meant.

Wonder, worry, but not worry for herself. She felt safe. Warm, even, so close to Kara. She just fidgeted, conscious of what felt like what should have been uncomfortable for Kara, even if she wasn’t reacting.

“Do you want to go outside?” Kara said.

“I- huh?” Alex said, distracted.

“It’s what you wanted before,” Kara said. “If you don’t-”

“I do!” Alex said quickly. “You… you remember?”

“Yeah,” Kara said. “This is… nice.”

Kara faltered, flushing slightly. Alex smiled and leant down a little lower, improving her balance.

“It is,” she said softly.

Ok. Maybe she’d been right about… things. Alex took another deep breath as they drifted over to the window.

She then drifted outside. Kara tilted slightly so they could make it out the window, and Alex felt her arms wrap around her to make sure she did the fall; Alex did the same, hugging close to Kara as they moved outside the house.

It was dark. Hopefully no one would see them, especially if they stayed over the roof. But still, she was flying!

And rather than look down at the garden, the road, the street stretching off in the distance… She still pressed herself close to Kara, still clung on, head tilted onto its side because all she could see was Kara’s arm. With the wind whipping around them, a little more skin could be seen. A few more letters.

Exactly as Alex had written it.

Alex gulped. _Alex Danvers_.

“Alex?” Kara said. “Do you want to go back down?”

“N-no!” Alex said. “This is good.”

Soulmates, then. There were probably more ordinary places to have a gay realisation than resting in Kara’s arms and floating over her home, and definitely ones that were less panic-inducing because it _still_ felt like Kara would know exactly what she was thinking. Her thoughts felt so loud she’d almost be more surprised if Kara couldn’t hear them. But still, it felt almost perfect.

She felt safe.

Slowly, Alex loosened her grip, shifting upwards slightly and feeling the cool wind brush past her. She started to laugh.

“You can do this all the time?” Alex said.

“I- I don’t,” Kara said.

“But you could,” Alex said. She breathed out, laying back down. “I don’t know why you don’t just stay up here.”

“There’s… plenty of things on the ground too,” Kara said.

“Mm,” Alex murmured.

All at once, she knew exactly what she wanted to write on Kara’s card.

* * *

“Happy Earth birthday!”

The smell of cupcakes drifted throughout the house. They were freshly baked, and a lone candle in one of them had just about been lit before it was extinguished by the rush of air from Kara super-speeding into the room.

She pouted until Eliza relit it and, beaming, Kara blew it out.

Cupcakes had always been the tradition for this day. It separated it from typical birthdays, and a dozen freshly baked cupcakes were a little easier to share around compared to whole cakes that Kara very nearly unhinged her jaw to try and swallow in one bite.

Speaking of, Kara promptly inhaled the cupcake before sitting back. Alex snorted.

And then Alex handed her the card. It was strange; she suddenly felt nervous. She’d barely dwelt on what she was doing up until that morning, where suddenly she started overthinking and panicking over every detail. There were things she’d been so certain of, and now she doubted.

A happy Kara took the card from her before Alex could talk herself out of it.

“Happy Earth birthday,” Alex said. Her voice shook slightly.

“Thanks!” Kara said.

She was still beaming, even as she opened the envelope and opened the homemade card. Her eyes lit up as she recognised the letters from her home, glancing over the top without even reading it to look at Alex.

“Thank you,” she said again, her voice softer.

And then she read it, and Alex squirmed. She watched Kara’s eyes skate over the words, watched Kara smile tenderly, and then watched her frown. Alex winced.

_Happy Earth birthday, soulmate. _

Was that because she’d been wrong? Or… She wasn’t sure what the word for ‘soulmate’ was. She’d had to piece it together, but idioms didn’t always translate well. For all she knew, she’d just written gibberish, jamming unrelated terms together and banking on it meaning the same as it did in English; maybe Kara wouldn’t guess-

Then Kara’s eyes widened.

She looked over to Alex, looking almost as worried as Alex felt; Alex tried to smile back, self-conscious and comforting in equal measure. Damn it, maybe she hadn’t thought it through. Kara hadn’t told her either. She’d assumed it was the same self-consciousness she felt, but…

Kara’s eyes widened again, and she breathed out, relaxing. She returned to grinning, and Alex found herself feeling much lighter.

Or maybe she was panicking over nothing. Again.

Kara scratched her arm idly, and turned her attention back to Eliza. Every few seconds, though, she stole a sideways glance at Alex and her smiled widened each time. Alex caught her doing it, and watched her giggle each time.

She’d said it. And she’d been right. She and Kara were… And it was actually happening.

“What are you smiling about?” Eliza said playfully, coming over with the rest of the cupcakes.

Kara quickly sat up straighter, closing the card quickly as though anyone else would be able to read it.

“Nothing!” they said together, and chuckled in unison. Eliza shook her head in exaggerated despair, but cracked back into a smile as she handed out the cakes.

* * *

It wasn’t until later that they had a real moment alone. Alex went outside for a breath of cool, fresh air and almost immediately Kara was behind her, jittering so much Alex wasn’t entirely sure her feet were staying on the ground.

“You know?! How do you know?” Kara whispered.

“I kinda, um, got a Kryptonese guide,” Alex said. She paused. “And yelled at your cousin.”

“You…” Kara said. She glanced back, and her eyes widened. “You remembered how it looked.”

“And checked, after,” Alex said.

“And you… don’t mind?” Kara said.

She fidgeted on the spot. Now she was slowing, feet still brushing against each other, not entirely comfortable being still.

“Why would I mind?” Alex said. Ok, dumb question. “I mean, ok, when I realised what it said I did… struggle a bit. It’s a lot to take in. Believing in soulmates is one thing, meeting one though, _knowing_ is… But I thought about it, and the more I did, uh, yeah.”

“And…” Kara began. She hesitated, looking back at the house as though Eliza was going to appear out of nowhere. “The sister thing?”

“I…” Alex bit her lip. “I didn’t really think about it.”

“You didn’t think about it?” Kara said. She started softly, then sounded almost indignant. “That was why I didn’t say anything! I thought you’d think it was weird, and you didn’t even…”

“Uh, sorry?” Alex said.

“You’d better be,” Kara said. She pouted. “Not even a little? I can’t have been worrying for _nothing_.”

“Do you _want_ me to be weirded out?” Alex said.

“No, no! Just…”

“I don’t really care what word I use for you,” Alex said. “I care a lot, and that’s not changing whether you’re my sister or my…”

Her voice trailed off. She met Kara’s eyes, and in seconds forgot how to speak. She wanted to move closer but she wasn’t entirely convinced that her legs would manage a step.

It was impossible to focus on anything else in the world. Nothing beyond Kara mattered, nothing beyond Kara being right there, achingly close.

“Soulmate,” Kara murmured. She seemed to be trying the word out in her mouth. “I like the English word for it. Soul-mate.”

She dragged the syllable out, making Alex smile fondly.

“You’re _not_ calling me that,” Alex said.

“Oh,” Kara said. “Why not?”

“You’re just not,” Alex said. “Can we try something less… sappy first?”

“Girlfriend?” Kara said suddenly.

Alex faltered. It was a moment before Kara reacted; Kara was the one who’d had longer to get used to the idea, while Alex was still slowly adjusting. She’d been so focused on how she wanted to tell Kara that she knew, that she hadn’t dwelled much on what it meant.

Soulmate to girlfriend, it… she supposed it was technically a step down, but it didn’t feel like it. _Soulmate_ was so abstract.

Technically it was what she’d been thinking of. She just hadn’t used the word; the word made it much more real. Much more… _more_.

“I think I like the sound of that,” Alex said.

Kara smiled. And Alex leant in before she could talk herself out of it, and found Kara’s lips awaiting hers eagerly. There was more than one way Kara could make her feel like she was flying.

Time didn’t really seem to matter; neither could saw how long it was before they pulled back, giddy and smiling and swaying slightly.

“Wow,” Kara said.

“You’re telling mom,” Alex said quickly. Kara’s almost dreamy smile quickly turned to a pout.

“Come on!” Kara said. “Why me?”

“Because I said it first,” Alex said.

Kara kept staring at her. Alex stared back, trained by years of practise dealing with the puppydog eyes she was convinced were another of Kara’s powers. Then Alex sighed.

“Fine,” Alex said. “I’ll help.”

“Knew it!” Kara said. “Want to go back inside?”

“Can we have a minute more?” Alex said.

“Always,” Kara said.

They lingered for a while longer in the garden. It was strange; when everything finally came out, it didn’t feel like they needed to talk about it. Words sometimes weren’t enough.

Until, together, they went back into the house.


End file.
